Why Blog?

My first assignment: Write a blog post about why you have a blog.

From here.
Posted by: Alana


I recently asked my brother-in-law why he didn't just beat me over the head with the thing. The Tivo, that is. He and my sister had been trying to gift me their old Tivo for a year. It even came to my house, got hooked up, and I was given the remote tutorial. Still. I was resistant to change. We have a satellite dish now and my dual-tuner DVR and I couldn't be happier or more in love. I continually thank my brother-in-law for doing what he had to do. I thank him for his tough love, for slapping me until I swallowed my medicine.

Similarly, my friends and I used to publish the JNAC Chronicles. Everyone had a month assigned to create the newsletter. Yes, we typed, printed, folded, stamped and mailed! What a chore! Nicole (the N) mentioned for years she had a blog that I should visit. I didn't really know what a blog was or want to make the effort to find out. Finally, she shoved it all down our throats by turning or out-of-gas newsletter into a group blog, the JNAC Chronicles. We all post on this blog and I couldn't be happier or more in love with it. That's us up top. Also note the visual addendum, Paul. We'll get to him later.

I blog because I like the audience. This audience of best friends, in particular, is nice. (They are unshockable, I think, allowing me to drop phrases like "naked and howling at the moon.") But just knowing anyone is reading compels me to write.

Consider: When was the last time you talked out loud to yourself?

I talk to myself when I am alone in the desert. Perhaps tripping on a rock I'll shout, "Son of a (bite tongue)... motherless goat!" I talked to myself last week while trying to take a scratchy tag out of a shirt with a seam ripper... "Mother (bite tongue)... may I!" When talking to myself, I don't expound. I keep it short and... sweet? I'm already in here, in my head.

I hate writing in a journal. I utterly refuse to do it! If I'm giong to write about my life or my day or brag about my child, I have just got to have an audience. I cherish my time alive on earth; it's short and precious. If I am going to take ten whole minutes to expound anything, it better damn well serve my vanity.

OK- one hour ago I was flying high- things under my belt- smiling at will...

Now I'm in the deepest LONGEST darkest depression. I want to run away and never come back. I feel like jumping out of my own skin- like I'm in my own personal Prison D'if.

Let me explain: IT ALL STARTED WITH YOUNG WOMENS.

I got called to YM as Laural adviser- not really bumbed about, but then again I haven't had to do anything yet until our first meeting tonight. It's not even YW that has me shoveling in the cookie dough right now...
We just got back from SLC and made a stop at IKEA. SO fun- I was thinking of all sorts of ways I could use IKEA to spruce up some crapy apartment and make it livable for the next few years until we could aford a house. I was actually getting excited- like it was a challenge I couyld gain some real satisfaction in tackeling.
I was OK having gone to 10 years of school and working by fingers to the bone at school and making/having no money. I was fine thinking $$$ does not matter to me and I don't need it, and my husband is really hot and I'm happy no matter what we don't have...
Then I went to this young womens meeting and saw them all.
The other advisors and leaders.
They were coming from houses and had keys to SUV's.
They were complaining of dirty dishes and unmade beds.
They were taking notes on where they lived in comparison to eachother.

They belonged.
They were settled.
They new so and so
and what's her name
and, didn't she teach my daughter in miamaids ten years ago?

They knew where they were going to be living next month.
They had been pulling sweaters out of their basements every Fall for the last 7 Falls.
They had been pulling underwear out of the same drawers every morning for the last forever mornings.
They were going to refill soaps next week
and buy a costco card next month.
They were going to drive home to their home tonight, and tomorrow, and next year(s).

They had garage door openers
and justified addiction to HDTV.

Most of all- they were there as tghey had been there and would be there.

They belonged.

They haven't been living out of suitcases for a year

Their stuff hasn't been in storage more than half of thier mariage.

They haven't forgotten where the Christmas sweaters are or which place you put this or that.

----------------------------------------------

I'm not saying fate has dealt us a raw deal. On the contrary. I still believe we have it great. I don't think we have had bad luck. I don't blame our suitcases on anyone or any market.

I AM NOT A VICTIM OF CIRCUMSTANCE.


...
...
....
I'm just depressed.

(you can tell, because I'm not even going to proof read)

Thanks to the August Visiting Teaching message (yes, I've had a VT dry spell but I'm back in the saddle again- ridin' high, ridin' high!), I am going to take part in this. I could really use a distraction to stave off depression. Maybe you should sign up, too? Anyways, if it's not lame and I decide to really take part, then come tomorrow morning I guess there will be a new post from me every weekday for the next 12 weeks.

Yeah right. We all know me. How many days you think I'll last? Bets? We all know how many times I dropped out of college at the very last hour I could get my tuition refunded. How many semesters did I load up my books and ride my little $99 bike over to Dixie and sell them back? Too many to count. My inner siren says I might quit. It also says this thing could turn out to be super lame. Stay tuned.

Williams - Oaks Park

We took Herbie and Sage to an amusement park last week and got some great pictures.

Just wanted to share!

Herbie hated this ride. It was too fast and scary for him. Sage loved it and went a 2nd time.

Taking after their Dad!

This is my favorite shot. They both look so happy. I can't help but smile when I look at it.

Williams - It's A Girl :)

We found out yesterday that we are having a girl. I was convinced it was a boy but I was wrong. Sage is so excited to have a little sister and we are happy with whatever we get.

Trust me- I'm on JNAC tri-daily.

No fair- I POST ON HERE TO- it's just that school started and you can not possibly imagine how completely and totally wretched it is for about a month and 1/2. Don't I get some sort of "bye" for August and January?

giveaway

check out Janna's blog today, Wish.
allmodern.com offered the blog a giveaway.
sign your sorry self up.

Williams - Mini Golf Adventure

For Family Home Evening on Monday night we took the kids miniature golfing. This was Herbie's first time and it was hilarious to watch him putt putt. He tried to swing the club at the ball like a bat. We steered clear of him. He also kept picking up our balls or running right in front of what would have been a perfect hit:) Sage surprised us all with A HOLE IN ONE on one of the holes. Herb and I didn't even come close. I think I got a 5 on that hole. You can see my little pregnant belly really good in the last photo of us sitting by hole 18. 5 months along and we find out what we are having in 5 days. Remember, if you click on the pics below they should open up larger in a new window so you can see them better.

Williams - Sage the Swimmer

Sage has been taking swimming lessons this summer. We have been going everyday for two weeks straight and it is amazing how much she has improved. She definitely has the best form out of any of the students when it comes to diving. She always has a big grin on her face because she loves it so much even when she does a belly flop she comes up smiling. I love to watch her. Since we live in Oregon, we have class rain or shine. The only difficult part is keeping Herbie at bay. He really wants to get in and constantly throws any toy he can find into the pool.

Williams - Ward Campout

Below are pictures from our ward campout. We camped in downtown Vernonia equivalent to Orderville or some other small town in Utah:) The weather wasn't perfect and its sprinkled a little bit but we had a great time. We brought our bikes and the kids rode their bikes on the bike trail. We even got a free tractor ride by a local farmer. He stopped on this bridge long enough to tell us that this is where they hold the annual lawn mower races. LOL! You'll notice that in one of the pictures Herbie is crying because we made him give up his bike for 5 minutes for another friend to ride it. Good times!

ALANA WHERE ARE YOU?

Since you are the only one that posts to this blog, we need you to come back and grace us with your presence.

Williams - The Heat Wave

Two weeks ago we had the heat wave of the century here. I think one day it reached 112 degrees. My car registered 116 at one point. Yikes! I do love the heat but the bad news is, is that we don't have air conditioning. When I lived in St. George, we were able to cool off in a nice air conditioned home. We broke down and bought a portable unit and it barely keeps the living room cool when we break 100. It is the hottest between 4pm & 9pm. So we would usually leave the house at the time, eat out (because it was too hot to cook), make sandwiches, go to the movies, swimming, anything to get out of the house. Herb and the kids slept on the tramp one night, and then the hottest night of all we blew up our air beds and we all slept on the living room floor with the air conditioner blowing right on us. Below is a pic of our makeshift bedroom and Sage and I hugging our beloved air conditioner.

Adios!

I'm out.

Another year that Brandon can't go on my family vacation with us! What a total bummer. Especially because Anika is old enough to really appreciate the beach and he's going to miss it all... he has to stay and work. Also: our car broke again! With all the car repairs I have charged to a card, I could have bought a new car by now. So my Mom is renting us a big ol' Ford Taurus, baby. This is where I will be for the next 8 days. Cara's Newport place is quite tiny so she rented us this place in San Clemente. And we'll be spending our days on the family plot. No, not that one- our beach plot just down from my Grandma's old house.

AND. If the plan works out, we are going to take the passenger Amtrak down to Sea World one of the days. Anika is going to freak out... excitement, horror, you name it.

AND. I just found out the rental has a crib. When my Mom told me, I literally crumbled to my knees in delight and shouted for joy. It's still going to be a nightmare dealing with the little princess but access to a crib might take the edge off.

Glass Man

Brandon (bless his heart) has been trying to talk me into mirrored backsplash for years now. (Molten glass runs through his veins.) I tell him he is crazy because he wants everything mirrored. And with beveled strips, of course. He also wants a huge, totally-out-of-line fish tank. I try to imagine what our house would look like if I let him go ape crazy on it. I imagine a 1980's party house complete with a mirrored tabletop where we would sort our fashionably-80's coke... Brandon's Bevel-Stripped Palace of Dreams.

But then I saw this and am thinking perhaps he wasn't totally crazy about the mirrored backsplash. I don't think it could work in our house but it sure does in those photos. But then again, I don't really want to see my muffin-top looking back at me while I bake. (umm, while I take the pepperidge farm coconut cake out of the box.)

Who am I to talk about the 1980's anyways? I've embraced them once again. I'm wearing a gold, digital casio these days. You heard me. Digital. And beyond skinny jeans, I pegged the other week. I tell you, I'm all but a breath away from doubling up my jazzercize socks over my stirrup stretch pants.

"i wanna type letters, mom"

This is Anika's new obsession which, thankfully, has replaced jumping on the mixing bowls. Since this video, her new words she practices are 'Janna', 'Mike', and 'Emmet'. (I think she wants them to adopt her!) Also: 'dog', 'bus' and 'frog'. She also requests to learn some strange words... "I wanna type poop, Mom. I wanna type nugget poop." The funniest is that she knows where and what the comma, apostrophe, dash, 'flower' (asterisk), bracket, equal, and the semicolon are.

I'm thinking of hiring her to take care of all my desk work, bills, e-mails. That's assuming I wouldn't be breaking any child labor laws. And I'd have to get her one of those keyboards that prevent carpal tunnel syndrome. And a cushy, swivel office chair... with a booster seat. Perhaps a headset to take calls?

rooster alarm

Ciara, I came across some of your words of wisdom in my Journal of Summer. Dated July 1998:

Usually most normal, boring people set their beeping, obnoxious alarm clocks for an exact time like, for instance 7:00 a.m.- 7:30 a.m. never an uneven number but Alana and I use a rooster alarm clock and set it on all weird #'s 7:02 for example. During those extra 2 minutes of sleep a lot could happen. You could finish a dream or finish the good parts. It's a rule not to set it on the hour.

-Ciara's words of wisdom.
(yes, you even wrote Ciara's words of wisdom.)

As you might expect, I rarely set an alarm because Anika wakes me up bright and early. But sometimes, perhaps leaving early for vacation or other rare events, I set it. And I still set it to random times. I physically can't bring myself to set a clock for 6:00. But 6:07 just feels better. Ciara, do you also still have this disease? Are you still setting alarms for weird times? What about sleeping with a pea underneath your mattress? Tell me you've broken that habit!

Child Bride of Short Creek (Crick)

Well, today is our sixth wedding anniversary. My brother's girlfriend saw a photo of me in my wedding dress and then heard me say something about my wedding. She was in shock. You should have seen the look on her face. She said she thought I looked about fourteen, just trying on a prom dress or something. Nope, I was 23. A wee little 23. Oh Alana, your hair. And I'm wondering: I have three sisters, do I not? Do they love me? Why didn't any of them teach me to do my hair?

Brandon and I were going to go out tonight but he had to work late (surprise) so I cooked up a romantic dinner for four at home. (me, the B, Anika and The Bemy).

How are you spending your days in the heat? Ciara, I hear you are having a heat wave. And I assume no central A/C in those parts? We go out early in the a.m. and then bunker down inside our concrete walls for the remainder of the day.

Has it really been six years? Have we really been together for eleven years now? I've been with the big B since he was 21 years old. That seems like such a baby. Jake is about to turn 21. Brandon turns 33 this September. Freaky. Even freakier is how quickly this last year has gone by. It seems like just two months since I was blogging the big 5 yr. anniversary!

^This makes me laugh.

Date with Alana

If I thought a date would be fun in highschool, I had another thing coming!

Nothing- I repeate, NOTHING compares with the glory that is DATE NIGHT WITH ALANA! I get nervous and giddy- excited to the point of sweating more than usual... It's one full evening of motormouth stories and laments. In short, date nights with Alana are something I positively live for!!!

kitchenette in the gun nest?

this.

my thoughts exactly.

my deepest desire,
down to my soul's bones,
is to get off the grid.

the whole thing's comin' down
so let's just get out of the way.

Good Ol' 455 Franklin Street

I spent many an hour in this very studio under the glare of Larisa Sklyanskaya. I was so exhausted one day and she caught me yawning. She screamed, "I am not your dentist!" but didn't kick me out of class. Usually you were out for the day if you yawned. The fear.

That's the first mistake I made when I taught ballet. I was way too friendly with the girls. If I ever teach again I'm going to kick it Sklyanskaya style. Or better yet... Eric Hurst style. But that's a story for another day.

Ahhh, San Francisco Ballet and the summer of my first true love: Ricardo Torres from Puerto Rico. His English wasn't perfect and I loved it. He used to invite me up to his dorm room (we stayed at USF) on the 7th floor and he'd turn on the classical station on his little radio. We would dance. And then we would take turns doing improv ballet to the music. My improv was always a little shy but Ricardo, he took it so seriously. (arabesque-penchee-with-sweat-dripping-down-his-jaw serious.) The big windows literally would fog up from the exertion. (Ricardo's roommate was Lane from NYC. He was flamboyantly gay and wore a short, silk robe around the dorm, to and from the showers.) Several letters post-summer, we lost touch. I know he made it big dancing for American Ballet Theatre (just like he said he would) and then up and left for the National Ballet Theater of Puerto Rico. Ricardo was straight, by the way.
Very straight.

bedding

... to even utter the word gets me excited. If I had a lot of money I could really go crazy with bedding. I constantly want new bedding. It drives Brandon out of his mind. Travel back with me, if you will, to when I was a mere five years old...

I begged and begged and begged for some mauve satin sheets. Wouldn't you think I would be interested in a new Cabbage Patch Kid? No, all I wanted was mauve satin sheets I saw in the Penny's catalog. I finally got them for my birthday! They replaced my cabbage patch sheets which I had also been obsessed with. I remember studying those cabbage patch sheets for hours, seeing what all of the kids were doing. But wow! I finally got my mauve satins. It wasn't many nights after my birthday that I remember falling out of my bed and hitting my head on my white toy box. This is an early and distinct memory. Those suckers were so slippery!

While Cara was up we were discussing bedding (this occupies 15-20% of all our convos) and were cracking up about my satin sheets at 5! We still have this blue comforter in the family that we line the truck bed with when me move. It's as old as I am. It's origin? Cara, a middle-schooler, worked many a babysitting job and saved for nearly a year to purchase it. She said she saw it at Broadway (the department store) and then yearned for and dreamed of it until she could finally purchase it. I must say, it was worth it. That sucker is still in one piece and soft as butter!

What funny little girls we were. Please tell me Anika didn't get the love for bedding. She had better ask for a doll house at five. Can't you just hear her whining now... "but Moooom, they're 400tc egyptian cotton!" ... stomp, stomp, stomp, (brief pause) slam!!!!

ladies' night

^toes

^chips and A1 sauce

^my Bday

^adorable

Janna painted Anika's toes a while back and ever since then Anika is obsessed with it. She sits so still you could practically take her to the salon. She saw me doing mine tonight and got her chair out and hopped in, waiting patiently. She even sits still while you blow them dry. I never thought I'd paint the little one's toes but yes, this is what we do while Daddy is working late. That and make some ghetto dinner that we eat without him. I try to do big grocery shopping on Friday so by Thursday the pickings are looking slim... pale, limp iceberg (really just a vehicle for full-fat ranch to ride into my belly) and baked potatoes (vehicle for entire cube of butter).

Anyone else just dying for those dark clouds to make their way over and dump their weight? You know I love a desert thunderstorm. Where are they? The waiting is hurting me.

What else?

Brandon took me out for my birthday last night. I delicately approached the subject of painting our bedroom while I am in San Clemente. A calm "sure". What? I thought there was no way I could ever get him to paint again and I would have to go it alone without his gifted and talented taping. Remember last year when I went to Santa Barbara and made him paint the bedroom blue? Have I met myself? My bed changes wardrobe more often than I do. Did I really think I could commit? Plus, it's the naked room. Somewhere I read how a woman painted her bedroom ceiling hot pink so it would give her bare skin a nice glow. The room reflects the color surprisingly well, leaving me looking like a science experiment. Clothed or unclothed, I need all the help I can get.

design blogs

Nearly every design blog out there bores me to tears. Sure, they post pretty things but I need to be amused as well. I have found two of the greatest blogs that I read everyday and thought I'd send them your way.

http://myfavoriteandmybest.blogspot.com/

http://www.isuwannee.com/

Both of these girls have great taste and make me laugh my head off.

And while we're talking design, this renovation freaked my mind. I am in love with this house. Love, love, love!!! That master! That den! That sun room!

Williams - High Adventure

Herb and I went on the Stake Young Women High Adventure trip as adult leaders this year. It was so much fun. Somewhat of a vacation for us. The first day we took the girls rock climbing, the second day we went mountain biking down an intermediate single track trail from Government Camp on Mt. Hood all the way down the mountain to a place called Zig Zag. It was an amazing ride. I can't wait until next summer so I can do it again, not pregnant. The third day we hiked to a place called Mirror Lake and then continued on up the mountain until we reached the tip top which overlooked the lake and Mt. Hood in the distance. It was a tiring up hill climb but the view was breathtaking. In one of the pictures you will notice a lake right behind Herb and I. Then there is another pic of us at the top and if you look behind all the people, you will see that same lake which is at the bottom of the mountain.

I have been camping for 2 1/2 weeks straight and I am ready to be done and take a break for a while. I started school a couple days ago but life is slowing down. Sage is taking a dance camp and swim lessons this week. The temperature here is record high and without air and being pregnant it can be quite miserable but we are surviving. I finally finished painting Sage's room so I will have to post pics soon.

Williams - Ciara's Birthday

We went camping at Timothy Lake for my birthday this year. We went with 4 other families in our ward. It was a great time, the weather was beautiful, we made the most delicious blueberry cobbler, and my friends even made me a rainbow chip cake. We had a lot of great pictures so I had to include a bunch. The one of Herbie with his head down was taken right after he fell in the lake with his clothes on. He is looking down pouting. If you click on the picture, I think it will open larger in a new window so you can see them upclose.

Was I hallucinating or did Jillian actually have a zit on that boat ride with Ed? But I didn't need to pause the Tivo to be sure of that one tiny dimple in her thigh while she visited with Ed's parents. Hallelujah! She is human! It must have been the humidity in Maui, poor thing.

Hey, at least something keeps me alive and kicking while Brandon works 15 hour days! I feel like I haven't seen him in ages.

What else? Anika saw her first tortoise yesterday. We are in the desert every morning but I haven't seen one for ages. We tickled his toes. Arrest me.

That's all she wrote.

BUY or RENT Cypress Point #64 and we'll love you forever

RENT or BUY our condo!!!

We have created a CONDO WEBSITE for your viewing and snooping pleasure.

PLEASE pass this WEBSITE on to your buddies and we'll love you forever!

http://cypresspointcondo.blogspot.com/

...(don't forget to tell your pals :)

saaays Happy!

Anika likes to pretend she can read. For instance: S. O. N. Y. saaaays TV.
You can imagine my delight when she climbed on my lap while I was checking out this.
While pointing her little finger at each letter she proceeded to say:

"S. H. I. T. saaays... (long pause, nervous me thinking oh please no, please don't say it) ....saaaays... Happy!"

Not only had I been laughing at the list, but now I was laughing at her. She never stops making me laugh. I'm thinking I need that list, as I use the phrase often, and that it would have come in handy back in the days of my hit list.

Oh! How I loved to cross of repentant offenders, few as they were, with red lipstick like on Waterboy!

Plan of attack:
confront? if the mood strikes.
ignore? certainly not.
stew? likely.
avenge? if opportunity presents.
talk shit?! check and check! (coz that's my fave)

For anyone who cares to know, I have really cleaned it up around here for the little one. I'll be damned if she's going to hear such things from my mouth!

Now don't go getting your panties in a bunch over that joke. I really mean it now. Around Anika I now have the vocab of a nun, a nice nun. Won't my Mommy be so proud of me?

Williams - What are you doing on January 22, 2010?

I will be giving birth to baby #3 :)

Genuine Human Needs

I cracked a loud can of diet coke at a ripe 9 a.m. today. Cara is asleep on my floor so I was trying to be quiet. On a whim yesterday she decided to fly up for the weekend. It was a total surprise! We were just talking last night, as we got into the sleeping pills, about how house guests see up close and personal all the substances you abuse, all your shame. POP! Cara didn't flinch.

The second I heard the can's loud POP!, I thought of an Abbey excerpt from Down the River and decided to whip out my old copy and find it...

We pause on a beach for lunch. The air quivers with heat, with albedo reflectivity from the radiant canyon walls. Must be close to a hundred degrees in the shade and the sand is much hotter than that. Gary unloads the cooler, the crowd goes for the drinking water and the Tang. The hardcases among us snap the tabs from cans of beer, kept cool like catfish in gunny sacks trailed in the river. Fssst! The others stare. Impossible to muffle that sudden release of CO2 under pressure, the conspicuous pop! Sounds like a grenade attack. Incoming! Nobody here flinches but everyone knows who is drinking the beer. And who's been hoarding it. Would be helpful if some clever lad invented a more discreet, a more genteel mode of opening beer cans. A soft, susurrant, suspiring sort of . . . s i g h . . . might serve nicely. A sound that could pass, let us say, for the relaxed, simple, artless fart of a duchess. Ingenuous. But our technology continues to lag behind genuine human needs.