I have been thinking about the term "housewife".
It's creepy.
The first thing that comes to mind... say... if I were doing a word-association psychological evaluation, is "housebroken".
"Is your bitch housebroken yet?", says the man to the other man.
"Not quite... but she is going wee wees on newspaper.", says the other man.
"Mine is an outside dog. She sleeps, though, in the garage.", says the man.
____________________________________________________________________
"Does your wife stay at home?", says the man to the other man.
"Yeah... but she does sell tupperware.", says the other man.
"Mine is VP of sales. She sleeps, though, in another mans bed.", says the man.
Is there some sort of status men hold if "their woman" stays at home? What is "stay at home" supposed to mean, anyway? I go lots of places. And what if Brandon is my bitch?
Is there some sort of status men hold if "their woman" has a high-power job? What is a high-power job anyway? I am controlling. I want one of those.
At the rodeo parade yesterday, a big crew (herd, flock, whatever...) of bikers rolled down Tabernacle. I scanned quickly to find a woman, just one, who was driving one of those bikes. None! You had better believe that if Brandon and I ever join Hells Angels, I'm going to be the one driving and wearing the t-shirt that says, "if you can read this, the bitch fell off." I want to feel that big motor rattle between my thighs as much as the next guy.
Has the feminist movement taught us nothing? We have the vote, so why not the handlebars? Drive that bike, ladies. Make that greasy guy choke on your hair as that free blowin' wind whips across your pretty little face.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
housebroken
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13 comments:
Nice insert Alana, little close to home but anyways pretty funny. Go ride the bike and let the bitch sit on the back
Never thought I'd say it... but today I actually asked Quinn if it was ok if I became a stay at home mom. I'm at the tail end of grading 197 essays the second time around and I'll tell you what- I'd give anything to be "housebroken" right now. Sure- I don't have the high corporate high paying job... but the real problem here is that I don't have a house to become house broken in. Hence the still slaving away over 197 essays. Heck- I'd even vacuum in pearls if that's what it would take to get the house.
hi paul
hi everyone. nice to see some visitors. can we all go to a movie RIGHT NOW?
I wish. Come to PV next saturday for the party?
Help, I have to work. This pup is leaving the house. I worked this last week and work tues, fri, sat, this week. I worked with Jenny!
work smirk. Quit. :)
work smirk. Quit. :)
I don't think working there will last long because my poor little legs were in a world of hurt! It's that dang intersection of veins again, and the other lame leg. I have my second surgery in November. I need to find a sit down job, or maybe amputate, get a wood peg, arrrrrggh, can I take your order?
they are looking for a part time secretary at the morgue
death, huh? is it an evening job? janna is looking too. this is fun to see "10 comments". makes me feel like this blog aint so lonely, and somebody is reading.
had to go back and censor. now i will be up really late because brandon just got a call from his dad to go give their friend a blessing at the hospital in mesquite. then had to pray for brandon, had to censor, not worthy... long story.
You are on a roll. I am still laughing. My mom and Herb keep looking at me as I bust up.
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